Mother’s Day 2010: What To Give Your Wife For Mothers Day
Its been my habit to speak to men about women on mother’s day,
And then speak to women about men on Father’s day.
This year I’m going to get a little more specific,
I going to try to help husbands figure out what they need to give to their
wives.
Gentleman it won’t matter if your wife is a mom or not.
I am going to help you give your wife the best present you
could possibly give her on Mother’s Day.
For you guys who are not married,
You just might gain a little insight into women in general.
I am afraid that no man really understands a woman.
I am always learning something new about Carol.
It was just a couple of weeks ago that I figured out something about
her that I didn’t know.
It’s Friday night, it’s supposed to be date night.
So she gets home from work and I ask her what she would like to do
for the evening?
Her response, for as long as I can remember, to that question has been
“I don't know; what do you want to do?"
Which has been a prelude, not necessarily to an argument,
But to that strange feeling guys get sometimes when they don’t
know what they did or didn’t do but whatever it was it
wasn’t good.
For years I thought “I don't know; what do you want to do?" meant
she was up for anything.
That’s why I would get confused when I would suggest
something like “how about we go to McDonalds and grab
a hamburger?”
And she would say—no, don’t want to do that.
After 3 or so more suggestions with her same response,
It got a little frustrating.
“Well since you seem not to want to do anything I want to do,
what do you suggest we do?”
And all of a sudden we’re back to square one.
The situation bothered me so I decided to do some research.
I conducted a rather informal survey.
When opportunity arose I would simply ask a gal standing in line with
me what “I don't know; what do you want to do?" really meant.
After about 100 responses I began to see a trend emerging.
“I don't know; what do you want to do?"
Actually means: I can't believe that you have nothing planned.
It was one of those rare Ah-ha moments---
I get it, I got it, and will proceed smartly in the future.
That little misunderstanding once again demonstrates that men can be
rather clueless when it comes to dealing with their wives.
Here it is Mother’s Day—another potential disaster in the making.
What do you get for your wife on mother’s day?
And don’t think for a moment if your wife isn’t a mother
you get a pass on this guys.
If your wife is not a mother you still need to acknowledge her potential for
becoming one.
At least she is going to want to see you honor your own mother.
And if you really want to score points do something for her
mom as well.
If your wife is a mom things get a little more complicated but not overly so.
Smart husbands buy a card that expresses their love and appreciation for the
mother of his children, something that acknowledges her hard work
and dedication necessary to raise your kids.
Just make sure you read the card all the way through
before you give it to her.
You would do well to buy a card and take her out for dinner to a nice
Restaurant, and call Molly Maid to clean the house.
You might buy her flowers.
Don’t think that a handpicked bouquet of dandelions will do the
Trick.
Checklist guys:
Card
Clean House
Dinner
Flowers
That leaves one thing—a Gift
What to get the wife for mother’s day?
There’s a video I need to show you guys,
There is an important lesson to be learned here.
Pay close attention.
Doghouse Video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyduncFpzl4
The gifts you give, or the gifts you forget to give can get you stuck in the dog
house men.
As the wise man once said—
Happy wife, happy life.
Hopefully now you see what is at stake in giving a
mother’s day gift to your wife.
In your Bible there is a letter inspired by God the Holy Spirit written by the
Apostle Paul to a congregation of Christ followers in the city of Ephesus.
I want to take some time this morning to read it and do a little
reflecting on it because we’ll find the type of gift we
need to give to our wives right there in the Word of God.
Ephesians 5:21-33 (MSG)
21 Out of respect for Christ, be courteously reverent to one another… 25 Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ's love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They're really doing themselves a favor—since they're already "one" in marriage. No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That's how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become "one flesh." This is a huge mystery, and I don't pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.
Now there’s a gift that is always welcome—
Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives.
That’s it—Give your wife the gift of all out love to her for Mother’s
Day.
The Apostle inspired by the Spirit gives us guys an analogy to figure out
what “going all out in love” for your wife looks like.
First Paul tells us going all out in love is exactly what Jesus does for the Church.
The Church in the New Testament refers to the people of God,
the Old Testament idea of the “chosen people,”
is the “Church” of the New Testament.
also referred to as the “Bride of Christ.” (Revelation 21)
So we can ask ourselves—How did Jesus love the Church?”
And come up with some answers on how Husbands can give the gift
of “all out love” to their wives.
Here’s a couple of observations:
1. All out kind of love is a sacrificial love. (Barclay's Daily Study Bible (NT)
Ephesians 5:25 (NLT)
Jesus gave up his life for her
Sacrificial means you take what is yours and give it to another.
You know what selfish means—
Selfish means what’s yours is mine and what’s mine is mine.
Sacrificial means above and beyond the call of duty.
Selfish means everyman for himself.
Sacrificial means paying the price to meet the need of another
Selfish means ignoring the need.
Sacrificial asks what I can do for you.
Selfish asks what you can do for me.
With sacrificial love Jesus embraces the Church.
Husbands give that same gift to your wife this Mother’s Day.
2. All out kind of love is a purifying love. (Barclay's Daily Study Bible (NT)
Ephesians 5:25-26 (NLT)
Jesus gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.
Jesus removes every obstacle that hinders the Church from being
acceptable to the Father,
Jesus provides an environment that encourages the
Church to become exactly what she is designed to be.
A purifying love is a love that makes the other better.
Now guys how do you make your wife better?
It sure isn’t by giving here a moustache remover.
Its by doing what it takes to create opportunities for your wife to
become the person God created her to be.
That might look like practicing the 7 Habits of a Disciple with her.
That might mean giving her time to go to Bible studies,
Christian seminars, something like Women of Faith,
Or freeing her up so she can use her gifts for the kingdom
That might mean cutting her some slack so that she can observe a
Sabbath Rest.
That might mean making it easy to get to worship on Sunday
Or getting to home group.
A purifying love can be one that sets a tone in the home,
That seeks to make a home into a haven.
That gets rid of anything that doesn’t conform to the life style
of a disciple and replacing those hindrances with the stuff
that does.
Purifying love is seen in actions that create opportunities to call forth the best in
someone else, opportunities to mature spiritually,
opportunities to deepen relationships,
opportunities to become the person God created that
person to be.
It’s with a sacrificial purifying love Jesus embraces the Church.
Husbands give that same gift to your wife this Mother’s Day.
3. All out kind of love is a cherishing love. (Barclay's Daily Study Bible (NT)
Ephesians 5:28 (NLT)
“…husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies.”
One thing I know for sure about a man and his body,
Men are into physical comfort,
If our body hurts we seek to alleviate the pain.
Another thing I’m pretty sure about a man and his body
We make sure it’s fed.
Then there’s a bunch of stuff that may or may not be universally applicable
to a man and his body –
stuff like: cleaned, groomed, dressed.
The point is that Jesus cares for the church in a way similar to a man caring
for his body, which is exactly how a man should care for his wife.
The reason you take care of your body is because your body is
precious to you.
Guys what do you do with the stuff that’s really
important in your life—You take care of it.
Guys the stuff we take extra special care of is the stuff we
cherish.
Just as Jesus cherishes the Church and a man cherishes his body,
a husband is to cherish his wife.
Cherishing love for your wife looks like this:
Connecting---
Women tend to connect through conversation.
Proximity is key, not only close physically,
but close emotionally.
Opening up—
She needs to hear your heart.
She wants to see your perspective.
She wants to know this stuff so she can be a
part of your life, a true companion.
Understanding—
She also wants you to listen to her heart.
She needs acknowledgment for her labor of love
for you.
Appreciation and validation come through a gift of
listening.
Guys if you need some more coaching on giving cherishing love to
your wife there is a book I highly recommend—
Its called “Love Dare.”
It will walk you through how to develop a cherishing love for
your wife in 30 days.
It’ll be the best $8.99 plus tax and shipping you’ll ever spend.
It’s with a sacrificial purifying cherishing love Jesus embraces the Church.
Husbands give that same gift to your wife this Mother’s Day.
4. All out kind of love is an unbreakable love. (Barclay's Daily Study Bible (NT)
Ephesians 5:31 (NLT)
“A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
Jesus comforts us with the truth that He will never leave us or forsake us,
He will not abandon the Church.
Would you willingly let your arm be torn off?
Would you willingly allow your legs to be ripped out?
Would you willingly allow your beating heart to be cut
out of your chest?
The answer is probably—no.
Spiritually 1+1=1,
Spiritually a husband and wife are one Being.
Just as you wouldn’t willingly allow your body to be broken apart,
You wouldn’t willingly allow your love for your wife to drift
away.
It would destroy a part of you that is irreplaceable.
Unbreakable love is the love that is described for us in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (MSG)
Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end.
That’s an unbreakable love.
Just like you want that kind of love for yourself,
So you need to give it away to your wife
It’s with sacrificial, purifying, cherishing, unbreakable love
Jesus embraces the Church.
Husbands give that same gift to your wife this Mother’s Day.
You may want to buy her a token of your commitment,
To serve as a symbol of your pledge to give to her sacrificial, purifying,
cherishing, unbreakable love everyday.
Just make sure it’s not a dual bag vacuum cleaner.
“Return to the Doghouse” Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6D6eP6EMj4
Checklist guys:
Card
Clean House
Dinner
Flowers
And a gift
Men here’s the gift to give your wife for Mother’s Day—
Give her sacrificial love, purifying love, cherishing love, unbreakable love.
Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives.
Now a card, clean house, dinner, flowers are nice,
Each score one point in the emotional bank account.
But this gift of love,
Sacrificial love, purifying love, cherishing love,
Unbreakable love is what must be your number
one gift to her, not only on Mother’s Day
but everyday.
Its that kind of love that keeps husbands out of the doghouse.